Given Names
by setepenre-set
Summary: The warden and the prison doctor fill out the governmental paperwork for the blue infant, and discuss names. (Prequel to Code: Safeword and to the Safe If We Stand 'verse.)


"How's it going, Len?"

Dr. Kelley looked up and regarded Warden Wilson, who was standing in the doorway of his office, with a baleful glare.

"Just wonderful," Dr. Kelley said with biting sarcasm, gesturing at the paperwork on his desk, "I'm only half through with all this and half of what I have put down is just guessing."

The Warden frowned and moved closer.

"How do you mean?" he asked.

Dr. Kelley rolled his eyes and flipped to the very first page.

"Age," he said, and waved a hand at the file cabinet drawer (hastily converted into a crib), and the blue infant inside said file cabinet, who was watching the two of them with a disconcertingly clear gaze.

(The fish—Dr. Kelley assumed it was a fish; it looked like a fish and appeared to be a fish upon examination—as much examination as he could perform with the fish encased in that ball that didn't have any visible opening—the fish slept in its ball in a corner of the drawer/crib.)

"You know how old he is? I don't know how old he is! Cognitive and behavioral development tells one story, size tells another; no saying what any of the developmental norms actually are for his species—"

"He's a boy, then?"

Dr. Kelley's glare became even more baleful.

"Hell if I know," he said. "X-rays and sonograms show an internal structure that differs significantly from that of a human; I'm not entirely certain what's digestive and what's reproductive—it's got one orifice that appears to be for excretion, basically a cloaca—there's a ventral slit near where a human's genital structure would be located; that opens up into a small cavity in the abdomen filled with these sort of—bud-like polyp-y things; no idea what those are. The ventral slit might be roughly analogous to a vaginal opening, and the cavity in the abdomen might be something like a human uterus—or it might be a marsupial pouch—or it might be a vestigial structure like an appendix—or it might, for all I know, be a flesh pocket used for storing snacks!"

He threw his hands up in frustration.

The Warden frowned down at the paperwork.

"But you wrote down 'male'," he said.

Dr. Kelley snorted.

"John, look at him. Blue skin, over-intelligent, giant bald head—he might get hair later, but I doubt it—the kid's gonna have trouble enough with all that. How much worse is all that gonna be for a girl?"

The Warden blinked, and then nodded slowly.

"You—didn't name him yet, did you?" he asked.

Dr. Kelley rubbed a hand over his face.

"No," he said, "I figured you'd want to help with that. How do you feel about 'John'?"

The Warden blinked.

"…John," he said, "not—Doe, right? I mean, I guess we could—Wilson? John Wilson…Jr.? We could call him Johnny. Or—or John…John Kelley." he said, looking carefully past Dr. Kelley, not meeting his eyes.

Dr. Kelley's chest tightened in an entirely unnecessary and ridiculous manner.

"I was thinking 'John Walker'," he said, refusing to acknowledge the heaviness of the moment. "And we could call him, Johnny."

John looked up at him, frowning a little in confusion. Dr. Kelley saw the second that he got it.

(Johnny Walker Blue)

Dr. Kelley gave a crack of laughter at the offended expression on John's face.

"We are not naming the kid after your favorite alcohol, Len!"

Dr. Kelley shrugged.

"Suit yourself."

The Warden glared at him.

"Ssssss," the baby said, making that odd sibilant hissing noise it—he—seemed to favor. "Ssssss."

He looked between the Warden and Dr. Kelley with a worried expression in his too-large eyes.

"What's wrong, kid?" the Warden said coaxingly, picking the kid up.

"Mind his head," Dr. Kelley said, standing so he could correct the Warden's hold.

"Sssss," the kid said again, looking between the two of them and smiling suddenly, his face lighting up. "Ssssss! Sssyx. Syx."

The Warden's eyebrows raised. Dr. Kelley, realizing that he still had his hands over the Warden's, let go quickly.

(John, evidently, had been too preoccupied with the baby to notice.)

"Syx?" the Warden repeated.

The baby laughed.

"Syx! Ssyx! Syx!"

"He's been making that sound all day." Dr. Kelley said.

"Syx?" the Warden said, bouncing the kid carefully, much to the baby's evident enjoyment. "What's syx? What's that mean, huh?"

"Syx," the baby said again, still laughing.

"—are you Syx?" the Warden said. "Is that you?"

"Sssss! SSSyx!"

The Warden looked at Dr. Kelley pointedly, his eyebrows raised even further. Dr. Kelley groaned.

"Oh, come on, John; we can't name the kid Syx," he said, "that could—it's probably just baby-talk; just babbling, probably not even a word—"

"Ssssss," the child said, reaching out and grabbing hold of Dr. Kelley's nose. He regarded Dr. Kelley with sudden solemnity. "Ssss. Syx."

"He says it like a word," the Warden said, looking stubborn.

Dr. Kelley tried to glare at him with dignity, which was rather a lost cause, since the baby was still holding on to his nose.

"Even if it is a word," he said begrudgingly, "it could mean anything. It could mean 'mother' or 'hello', for all we know—"

"Ssyx," the said, smiling again, holding on to Dr. Kelley's nose.

The Warden snickered into his moustache.

Dr. Kelley rolled his eyes, recognizing a lost cause when he saw one.

"All right. Fine. Syx it is," he agreed with a put-upon sigh. "What last name do you want me to put down?"

(Syx Wilson-Kelley was a perfectly absurd name, and of course, and there were a hundred reasons why they couldn't name the child that. But—)

"No last name," the Warden said, looking at the baby, not looking at Dr. Kelley. "Just Syx."

* * *

 _notes: the prison doctor's full name is Dr. Leonard Kelley. He's named after Dr. Leonard McCoy (played by DeForest Kelley) from Star Trek: The Original Series. His character was developed in discussions with Lynati about how Megamind came to be classified as male._

 _The bud-like structures that Dr. Kelley describes are the prepubescent forms of Megamind's tentacles; they develop fully during adolescence._

 _(this is a prequel to both Code 'verse and Safe If We Stand 'verse, but Dr. Kelley's storyline proceeds differently in each of these universes following this story.)_

 _"Syx" is a term of endearment in the language of Megamind's people. It means "my love/my dear". Megamind tells the warden and Dr. Kelley that his name is "Syx" because that's what his parents called him._


End file.
